I was just reading one of the many sets of rules for slaves that can be found on the ‘net, specifically The McDade Principles. I was reminded, yet again, that what works in BDSM for any given person, or couple, or group, doesn’t necessarily work for all.
My own approach is far more relaxed. The rigid rules such as those given in that text just don’t suit my character. And aside from that, they are too much hard work, and sometimes, highly inconvenient. A sub/slave should make life easier, not harder – in my view.
I have four rules which are absolute. There are, in order of importance:
- No lies, under any circumstances, or for any reason.
- Respect, always. Respect is due to a sub for the gift of submission. But it is also expected and required.
- If a sub has a question, it should be asked. It is far better to ask than to make assumptions and possibly fuck up.
- Obedience, without question. And if obedience is not possible, there must be a good reason.
I have other rules, but they are not absolute, and will vary on circumstance. Sometimes they are simply not practical or even possible. In no specific order, some of them are:
- A sub will always address me as “sir”. Use of my name is permitted only in exceptional situations.
- The English language is not to be mangled, proper rules of capitalization, and use of pronouns is required (ie, a sub refers to himself as “me”, not “it”, and uses “I” not ‘i’).
- When standing still, a sub kneels to my left (never my right), within reach of my hand – unless this is not possible for some reason.
- A sub must make himself visually appealing and desirable. Minimal clothing, therefore, but dictated by the place/situation.
- When put on display, a sub must be fully erect.
- My piss and cum must never be wasted – unless I say otherwise. These are both gifts and must be cherished and desired.
- Physically, a sub’s primary focus must be my cock and balls (unless otherwise directed). If he is not otherwise occupied or ordered, a slave should attempt to place himself as close as he can to my groin, thus indicating his readiness to serve and please.
I love to laugh, so wit and humor are encouraged. But the rules given initially always apply, and specifically: respect.
And now a side issue. Many of the texts on slave rules talk about a slave/sub living to serve and obey their owners. Few of them however, mention that a slave/sub has needs too. All humans have them, and for a relationship to succeed, they should be met. And most certainly understood and acknowledged.
A sub is an altruist: his pleasure derives from giving pleasure. (Thus a form a punishment is that of depriving him of the ability to please, by locking him up.) Therefore, a Master/owner should understand that is is not simply a sub’s role to please, but it is also his need. So when I wrote above that a sub should make it clear that he wishes to please,this means that he does it not only for the sake of his owner, but for himself as well. As a specific example, the sub must literally crave his owner’s cock, his piss and cum. If he acts out of a sense of duty rather than out of need, then something is wrong – at least in my view.
And I’ll end it here. For now.
